Returning

My little visit

I arrived back in Lansing on Thursday evening after being out of town for a few days for spring break. During this break, I had a lot of time to sit and think, one of my favorite activities. I really needed some space to process things, and have some elbow room for my thoughts and feelings. Coming back, I felt a little swell of happiness, because I knew Lansing was my home, and I was coming home. It hasn't been easy to accept this, however I think it is time. It would be distracting for me to constantly be thinking of some other place. Hidden in this other place is my inability to live in the present, so that means I am also constantly in the past or in the future, making things up about what might happen.

I feel a great deal of relief to know that Lansing is my home. I've been here for 7 months now, and have had my ups and downs. Now, however, I think it's time to put some of that to bed, tuck it in, and say, "It's okay to just nap, and dream. Ups and downs, you can sleep now." I've always had a hard time figuring out how my environment connects to who I am. I haven't moved a great deal in my life, or at least, I have moved a lot but it's always been around the northwest. Being in Michigan has been an awakening of trying to learn how this landscape settles inside of me because it is so completely foreign to anything I have ever lived with. But I'm finding peace now, and as a mentioned earlier, a little swell of happiness.