Tinkering

This evening I will attend my last class for the semester. It is somewhat of a momentous event, because it also marks the end of my first year as a doctoral student. It is hard for me to believe that nine months ago I moved to Lansing, and that 8 and a half months ago I started this program. Obviously, I have learned a lot of things since coming to Michigan, both about the place and about myself. One thing, however, stands out a little more than other things, and although it isn't something I've learned so much about myself as something I have come to understand better. I have always been a "tinkerer." When I start work on something I enjoy, I can keep going back to it and working on it. Even if I don't enjoy it so much, if it gives me some sense of intellectual or artistic food, I'll still continue to tinker with it, to figure it out, to take it all apart and put it back together. Obviously, this works in my favor as a student.

For this reason, I have dabbled a lot in a lot of different things and you can tell this by my varied career. A few weeks ago I was chatting with a woman who runs a fellowship program that I will join next year, and I had sent her my shortened version of my resume. She asked what was going on during the 8 year gap of when I graduated with a BA and when I started my resume history. I gave her another shortened version of "art instructor, started a summer program in a small town for art and science, worked at a small book press as a bookbinder, did some substitute teaching on the sly because I'm not certified, joined Americorps, traveled around the country by train for 6 months, worked as a visual merchandiser and fluffed pillows and moved sofas for a living, blah blah blah." I didn't really think much of it but she laughed and her eyes got big and she said, "You've done a lot!!" I hadn't ever thought of it that way, because until I started a more linear career in the nonprofit sector my life did seem a little untethered, but also natural.

It would have been naive of me to expect that I could continue on in my career in nonprofit. I tried to stick to it, and climb that ladder as it were. However I jumped jobs every 2 years because I was restless. I liked the chaos of things and putting order to them and once that was done, I would grow bored or frustrated and then find another place that hired me to clean house. Thus, I finally bent to my desire to tinker in a field I knew I belonged, and that brought me to Lansing. Now that I'm here, I understand more fully how well I can tinker. I tinker all the time, reading, writing, talking through ideas, listening. Sometimes I get tired, sure, but I'm usually pretty content - even joyful sometimes - at all the tinkering I get to do. Even when there is no useful effect of my tinkering, and I don't always know what it is for or what it will become, that I can try to make little improvements to my ideas and flesh them out is truly enjoyable.

Fresh Water Beaches

When I first moved to Michigan, I was here alone for the first three weeks as Kevin had to go back to Seattle to finish up work there. It took a few days for me to get my bearings, and then I started to explore around Lansing on my bike, then started driving around the state. One place I went was to the coast of Lake Michigan. Over the last weekend, Kevin and I went there to spend the day together. I have only been to the lake a couple of times now, and I think it may take a few more times for me to get used to the fact that it doesn't have a sea smell. It is such a huge body of water that it feels like the ocean, apart from the fact that there is no seaweed, no salty briny smell, no tidepooling, no big crashing waves (until a speed boat goes by). What it does have is soft soft sand, and fresh water, and lapping little waves. It was too frigid to dip my toes in the water, but I know in the summer when it's hot and humid I'll likely return and have a long water walk along the shores.

As A Tourist (Washington DC Post 2)

I had some time at the end of my trip to Washington to take in some of the sites. One thing I didn't do, however, was check the hours for the many free museums along the National Mall. I've been to these museums many times, and so on this trip I decided to hit the Newseum, having heard a lot of good things about it. So at about 3:30pm I left the AAU, went to my hotel to change into play clothes, and walked down to the Mall. It was a beautiful day! So, as I do when I'm traveling alone, I walk. And walk. And walk and walk and walk. And forget about what I may have planned to do. And so I ended up at the Washington Monument. I kept walking and almost made it to the WWII Monument, when I decided that my feet kind of hurt (I did not bring my walking shoes, for reasons I'm not sure of) and sat down for a bit. Then I decided to make my way back towards the Capital Building. And as I walked past some of the Smithsonian Museums, I thought "Maybe I'll just pop inside and take a quick picture of a diorama for Kevin." I noticed the sign on the outside that said the Museum closed at 5:30, so I checked the time, and it was....5:24. I'm not completely sure where the time went, but that is when I learned that the Newseum I had planned to visit closed at 5pm. Along with many of the others. I took in more sites. My feet hurt, I sat down. I made my way to the American Art Museum (it closed at 7pm) and found a lovely folk art display. It was about this time that I started to realize my feet were really tired, and I was hungry. So, per a recommendation from a friend, I went to a great little Asian Cafe and had myself some delicious Bento. A full stomach and a short half a mile back to the hotel and I tucked myself into bed, ready to head home the next day.

Faculty Talk (Washington DC Post 1)

I've been in Washington DC for the last few days, here for a convening of faculty and department chairs to talk about improving teaching for undergraduate STEM fields. (Don't yawn, it's super interesting!) My assistantship provides travel funds for me to join in on things like this, which means I get an insider's view on what people talk about when they talk about trying to make deep, systemic change within a university department. And, since I'm an org-loving and faculty-leaning interested grad student, this is right up my alley. Jim, who is my supervisor, knows my interest in this area and has been extremely supportive and encouraging. Plus, I got to see another side of Jim, a very social and beloved individual by many of his peers. Have I mentioned that I will miss him? Because he's the best. This trip came at a very good time (but depending on your perspective, a very bad time) because it was during the last week of the semester before finals. It just meant that I had to shove all of my due dates up a week because there was no possibility of me doing any school work while I was here. My days were jammed packed with discussions about teaching strategies, organizational change, cultural barriers to change, faculty roles, and student success. So many rich conversations.

Scenes from the AAU, and the workshops

Taxes and Bird Feeders

Kevin put up two bird feeders a couple of weeks ago, preparing for our feathered friends to visit. Last summer we had a Ruby-Throated Hummingbird who happily found our feeder, and we are hoping to see him/her again. In Seattle, Anna's Hummingbirds stick around all year, however it's obviously too cold for that nonsense here in Michigan. We learned that in Mid-Michigan, two things happen by April 15th, you pay your taxes, and you put out a hummingbird feeder. Not knowing that this was the suggested rule for birders, we intuited this might be the case and we were right on time! No sightings yet, but we are ready and changing our sugar water every few days.

Listening Not Singing

Now that I am able to walk again to campus I have been listening to a lot of music. Not that I didn't listen to music a lot before I started walking again, but now I can listen to a complete album as I make my way to campus. This does two things for me: it makes me appreciate music, and it makes me miss it terribly. I always considered myself a painter who was a musician on the side. Some might disagree with that assessment especially because I have been more prolific in music than in visual arts in the last 5 years. Despite what artistic part of me is "on the side" I have been missing the creative parts of my life. How I cope with this is to listen to a lot of music. Yesterday I was missing my musician self quite particularly, so I opened up some old recordings and gave them a listen. It's always been a strange feeling to listen to my own music, but I do it anyway because it's like familiarizing myself to someone who is a part of me but is much more quiet these days. I don't know yet if during the summer I will make any music, or just read, or just whatever. I don't like to force myself to make stuff now because I live such a disciplined life already. (I admit that at one point I did live a very disciplined artistic life, but not right now). So we shall see. Here are a couple of tracks I recorded for some friends who put together compilation albums. My way of listening to myself. Fairuza and For July

Make Room for Jessica Fletcher

What can I say? Jessica Fletcher is the best sleuth I know!

Last night I finished up my homework stuffs around 9:30, then I sighed and declared, "I'm just going to watch some TV now." So I opened up my web browser to Netflix, and clicked on some Murder She Wrote. Kevin, in the kitchen, asked, "Murder She Wrote? You're still watching that? I thought you were finished." I responded, "Oh No! There are still a couple of more seasons left I have yet to watch." I understand Kevin's confusion. I've been mowing through Mad Men recently while I do some mindless data entry (don't worry, I'm thorough and double check all of my work) and so have neglected MSW (that would be Murder She Wrote) for a while now. Some evenings having time to watch TV and relax is just what I need. I admit I try to do this every night, but when I end up working as late as last night the sweetness of curling up on the couch and watching MSW is so much more. The end of the semester is almost here, and I'm cramming all of the last pieces of assignments into these last two weeks. I have a presentation tonight (which should be fine, despite the fact that I abhor being in front of an audience) and am having to re-write 90% of another paper (which again, I hope is okay because I have a partner for that one) and one last paper on my own. I should add that I'm actually cramming this all into THIS week because I will be out of town almost all of next week for work I do for my assistantship. So, at least last night, Jessica and I were back on! Sorry Don Draper, we'll meet again over the weekend.