Back To It

It never ceases to amaze me how the breaks between semesters really mess me up. The first week after a semester is over, I'm still in work mode, and trying to do things. I usually have goals for each break, which sometimes I accomplish. This time around I hoped to get a good start on a literature review for my dissertation proposal, and I did (although because I have unrealistically high standards, I still don't feel like I have enough done). Then over the last week or so, I haven't done much of any work for school, and true rest has finally set in. I want to house project, I want to sew clothes, I want to craft things, and I can't because school starts next week. This week I've already started back to work with my assistantship and that has gotten me already into a work mode, albeit grudgingly.

The back and forth of being in work mode and then finally having enough days away from it that I can figure out how to rest, only to realize I have to find a way to get back into work mode is discombobulating to say the least. And this experience happens almost every time I am on break from school. It's rather annoying! I'm not ungrateful for my vacation break at all, it's just hard for me to move back and forth between the two with only three weeks between. It's like interval training. When I catch my breath I have to go hard again for another round. Moreover, I feel a little more pressure to get back to it more quickly than usual.

What makes this semester different than others is the urgency I feel to try to complete my dissertation proposal, and defend it. Basically what this means is, I'll write the first three chapters of my dissertation, considered the proposal portion, (anywhere between 75-100 pages) and then get my dissertation committee together where they can hammer me with questions so I can prove I'm worthy of continuing on as a PhD student. Obviously, I want to do this all before, oh, let's say May 20th because you know, Baby B is scheduled to make her arrival on the 29th. So the sooner, the better. I have to keep in mind as well, that all of my best plans may come crashing down because, oh you know, Baby B could decide that she wants to come early. So, I'll do my best. And for now, I'll savor the closing days of the winter break and practice writing on a more regular basis so I won't be in too much shock when the semester really begins next week.