I'm Becoming My Mother

I was about ten years old when I first learned of the similarities between my mom and I. This similarity wasn't observed by me, but announced with astonishment by a family friend. When I was young, we would sometimes drive to Medford, Oregon to visit with our family friends, and during one of these visits the matriarch of the family exclaimed to me, after having observed me doing a simple task with my hands (it could have been opening a Pepsi can for all I know), "Oh MY!! Your hands are just like your mom's!" Then she grabbed my hands and said again, "Look at your hands, they look just like your mom's!! You have you mom's hands!" Needless to say, I didn't know what to do with this information, because I thought I had my own hands.

Indeed, I do share a lot of physical similarities with my mom, for which I am grateful. For example, I rarely sunburn. And if I do, it always turns into a nice tan. I have seen many of my friends over the years burn and blister, and I admit I've never burned that badly, even when as a kid I never used sunblock because I don't remember it being used as religiously as it is now. (I do use it religiously now, though). I'm petite. Yes, this is sometimes an annoyance, but like my mom, I have purchased many pieces of clothing in the kids' section. That really nice down coat? It costs 1/2 the price in the kids' section.

Our similarities, however, go much deeper than our looks. Over the years I've learned how much like my mom I am. It's so easy to find our differences, yet the ways in which we are alike are ways that I rely on quite often. My mom's ability to focus for long periods of time, for example, is something that has been handed down to me. As a kid, I remember my mom preparing lesson plans for her class, or grading papers for long periods of time. Now, she quilts. And this is the kind of activity that requires focus, and she does this for hours. Her interest in quilting hints to another trait we share, I our knack for creative thinking. My mom has a gift for thinking creatively, and bursting out with ideas that are filled with color, playfulness, and imagination. I'd like to think I have some of this.

There is one trait, however, that I do hope I will grow into. She has an ability to think of others while also preserving the person she is. Her thoughtfulness is both for people, and also about herself. I have often talked with her about our own interior lives, those prayerful lives where we look at ourselves and ask questions, sometimes scrutinize, and challenge our own ideas and views of the world in positive ways. This trait gives her a gift of loving others in ways that are much deeper and more true. I hope this trait matures in me because she has given me a picture of what it looks like and it's truly remarkable. Happy Mother's Day, Mom.